ABC’s of the Purposeful Living Paradigm

Do you love basics? Knowing the rules? Doing what is acceptable/expected? Then you probably have some ABCs that you do in your life and business. The basics!

Living in the Paradigm

The Purposeful Living Paradigm is a methodology we have been living for most of our married lives (a span of 48 years shortly). Peter  started living that way as a child, he has always lived to his purpose.

What is Peter’s purpose – to learn and understand as much as possible. He loves to synthesize new thoughts, new ways of looking at the world. He asks different and often difficult questions. He studies what people do and say and then asks them why and would they do things differently, if they could? His analytical ability astounds me. He is not a fan of formal education as he loves the research, the seeking out of patterns and behaviours. He listens. He prothletises. He challenges. He assumes very little. And he takes very little personally – your opinion is yours and he allows you to keep it.

My purpose is to help as many people as possible to live their purpose. As a business mentor this is often hard as I want to tell people what they should do if they really want the results they say they do. I tend to believe people and take them at face value. Sometimes this works really well but often people tell me only what they think I want to hear and that means we have a confused base to start applying the ABC’s of the Purposeful Living Paradigm.

Before I explain the ABCs, we need to understand the word paradigm and one of the quirks of human nature.

According to dictionary definitions: A paradigm is

  • a framework containing the basic assumptions, ways of thinking,and methodology that are commonly accepted by members of scientific community such as  a cognitive framework shared by members of any discipline or group.

A quirk – most people when they shift paradigms cannot remember ever having believed or thought differently. It takes awareness and discipline to recall old paradigms and when we shift our paradigms we generally believe we are moving to something better so why would we want to recall the previous paradigm. Shifting is because either the old paradigm did not work or we saw the light of the new paradigm. And yes I want you to shift but shift so that choose and remember.

That is importance of the A in the ABCs.

The ABC’s of Purposeful Living Paradigm

A: AWARENESS/ ACTION

  • Are you aware of your thoughts and actions?
  • Are you aware of what is happening around you without getting distracted from your activities?
  • Are you taking action and doing something that moves you towards meeting your needs and the needs of those around you.
  • Are you acting in a manner consistent with your purpose?
  • Are you acting according to your values?

YOUR ATTITUDE

B: BEHAVIOUR/BELIEFS

  • Actions matter but it is your behaviour that tells more. Using the Behavioural Archetypes, we often learn that we act in a way that is more reactive than natural.
  • Behaviour is how we live our values and our manifesto.
  • What you believe in keeps you on course to live your purpose.

C: CONCEPTS/COMMITMENTS

  • Concepts are the ideas and beliefs that we hold and we need to always live and act in a manner consistent with those beliefs. Unless we live purposefully according to our beliefs we can feel guilty.
  • Guilt and remorse are different. Remorse occurs when you inadvertently hurt someone. Guilt is when you hurt someone intentionally. Either way, apologise and forgive and move on. This is not easy but can be done without regret or concern.
  • What are you committed to? Passion and purpose fit with our commitments and our commitments are what we promise ourselves and others. Are you committed to live your values and purpose. Commitment overcomes obstacles and keeps you focused on what matters to you.

Are you using the ABC’s to live a purposeful life? Need help with these aspects? Just ask? You can learn and participate in the Paradigm by joining the Paradigm’s Facebook Page

May you always live in the Purposeful Paradigm

Word Mentalist

 

Purposeful Living Paradigm

Recently we introduced people to the Purposeful Living Paradigm. This paradigm is based on over 50 years of study, learning, experience and helping/mentoring business owners, students and colleagues.

  • We have learned from hundreds of gurus and we believe they have missed a couple of elements that we believe are key to the paradigm.
  • We believe in personal responsibility,
  • We believe in true equality (no hierarchy)
  • We believe that business can be conducted in a manner where everyone gains what they need in a timely fashion which eliminates poverty and isolation.
  • We believe that living in the paradigm means that you are connected to others but your realise that it is a privilege, not a right.
  • In the paradigm, you know the difference between responsibility to and responsibility for.
  • Awareness is a key to living in the paradigm. You acknowledge that everyone is and they are perfectly them in this moment. You accept that they have a right to their point of view, ideas and concepts and you appreciate the differences and similarities.
  • You live by a manifesto of doing your best, assuming nothing, taking nothing personally and regret nothing because you did your best and learned from the experience.

Why Purpose?

Because purpose is important.

Purpose keeps you going through tough times.

Purpose ensures that everyone benefits.

Purpose removes the need for security blankets because it recognises the continual growth and development that purposeful living people experience.

Purpose challenges assumptions and helps one acknowledge, accept and appreciate others

Purpose keeps you grateful, humble and living in the now.

Purpose helps you enjoy day to day more fun, funds (resources) and fitness (mental, physical, emotional and spiritual).

If you want to join the paradigm or learn more about living in the paradigm, join our Facebook Page and watch for more information coming shortly.

If you want your organisation or business to be more purposeful and enjoy the true benefits of purpose let us know.

Purposeful Living is FUN!

To your purpose

Word Mentalist

Feedback- Positive or Negative?

We all get feedback every day. Some of it is positive. Some of it is negative. Some is actually neither but we perceive it as one or the other. And some of it is just down-right MEAN.

Feedback comes in words, actions, lack of response, and from our own bodies. Hunger, habits, pain, bodily functions are all feedbacks of different types.

But today let’s talk about verbal feedback.

Recently I received a feedback that I am a negative person. Now I look at the comments and want to check if I really am as negative as they say? From my viewpoint all I wanted to do is understand their thinking, I was asking for information or making comments on things I could see that could be improved. But it seems that it is easier to call me negative rather that admit they don’t want to look at the situation I am seeing. This is over-simplified as there is lots of other stuff happening and that does affect the choice of words on all sides of the equation.

Business, governance and even life are about managing risk. If you bungy jump or parachute or do some other risky potentially life threatening activity, you check to see that the situation is safe. You ask about the risks and the safety provisions. You understand that there are back-ups, safety harness, secondary chutes. Often we assume that they are in place but we fail to check that they are. We believe that since we are paying for the experience, the staff and owners will ensure our safety. Have you ever really read the forms you sign before stepping out on the ledge?

Maxwell Maltz wrote a book on Psycho-cybernetics many years ago. It was written as a personal development book and the basis of the book was that feedback both positive and negative would benefit athletes, staff and even parents raising children.

Feedback – Reactions/Actions?

  1. How you give that feedback affects the person receiving that feedback but the effect depends on the relationship. A strong relationship means the feedback can be discussed and both parties learn more about themselves and the other person.
  2. Unless you understand exactly what the person giving feedback means by the feedback given, the resulting actions and emotions can be unexpected.
  3. Bullying is a form of feedback yet we often pay coaches and others to help us change a habit or improve a performance.
  4. The person receiving the feedback can accept or refuse the feedback depending on their level of respect for the person giving the feedback or their opportunity to respond to unjust feedback.
  5. Feedback happens on many levels. Touch a hot stove, a sharp knife or walk into an unknown situation. Feedback helps keep us safe and teaches us to watch out for certain situations.
  6. Movies, television, media, books and other entertainment provides us with feedback on worlds we may never encounter. Our expectations on what will happen is coloured by our experiences, knowledge and ideas.
  7. We can give permission to people to give us negative feedback – sports coaches, diet coaches and sometimes bosses. But that feedback can then carry over into other areas of our life unless the feedback is constructed to comment only on our behaviour or the viewing of the actions, not on who we are.
  8. When feedback is destructive to “who the person is”, then what tends to happen can be soul destroying and can lead to depression and other serious health states. Telling a person they are stupid or useless are examples of this kind of soul-destroying feedback.
  9. When you receive feedback that hurts you can modify it by saying yes at the moment that may be true but…and then do something that builds esteem. A gratitude exercise can help and so can a hug
  10. Remember that feedback is a loop, a loop you can change. The Universe sent this message to me today. I think the sage advise here is a great way to deal with feedback.

The next time someone upsets you, think, “Thanks for pointing out that I’ve begun depending on you. Time I lose the expectations.” 

And the next time someone doesn’t take your view into account, think, “That’s okay, I was once like that.” 

And if someone steals from you, think, “It was nothing, my supply is the Universe.” 

Or lies to you, think, “I’m sorry you feel that need.” 

Violates you, “All for my growth and glory.” 

Is rude to you, “Cheer up, dear soul, it’ll be okay.” 

Judges you, “Thanks for sharing your truth.” 

Drives by you like a bat out of hell, “Be careful, my friend. I love you.” 

And the next time someone greets you with a smile, smile back, like you’re sharing a secret. 

Headmaster,
The Universe

My feedback to you today:

You are AMAZING

Have a wonderful day

Word Mentalist